Skip to main content

That Thing You Do

My husband hopped out of the car to pump gas, and a few minutes later hopped back in and handed me two yellow tubes of lip balm. I looked at him both confused and excited. 

"That's your favorite kind of lip balm, right?" he asked, confused at the look I was giving him.

"Yeah, but...I mean...thank you! It's just strange that you went out to pump gas and came back with these." I immediately popped one open and slathered it on, puckering goofedly in the mirror while bouncing happily in my seat. 

"Thank you, honey! You just made my whole day right here!"

Then I pulled up the middle console and tossed one tube inside and slipped the other one in my pocket. (After all, you can never have too much of this stuff!) I spent the rest of that afternoon on cloud nine over those two seemingly insignificant tubes of yellow lip balm!

There wasn't anything special or expensive about these little gifts in and of themselves. It's what they represented that made them so special. He thought of me and what I enjoyed as he was doing a very mundane task. He thought of me when he could have been thinking about anything else.  Fruit-flavored beeswax had transformed my husband into the greatest man in the world!

Husbands, find out what means the world to your wife and do that. You'll be surprised at how small of a gesture will fill up her love tank, and make you look like the sexiest man alive! Pay attention to what lights up her eyes. Does she like when you bring home flowers, would she prefer to spend some time chatting with you over coffee, or would she enjoy a night out with her girlfriends? Has she always dreamed of visiting Europe or the Grand Canyon? Is she just dying for you to take her ballroom dancing or whitewater rafting? 

Once you find out what she loves and you've done it again. I can't stress that enough. Make showing your wife affection a habit. Put it on your schedule at first if you have to.  Your birthday may not be a big deal to you, but I promise her birthday is a big deal to her. And anniversaries and kids birthdays too. Do something on these days to set them apart from every other day. 

If you have absolutely no idea where to start (like I do when I'm trying to figure out something special to do for my husband), I suggest reading "The 5 Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. I try to skim the book once a year because there's always something I have to relearn.

Don't stress out about how to show your wife affection. We can tell when you're making an effort, and we love it! 


Heather said…
Ben & I were JUST talking about this!! Too funny. Our love languages have morphed over the years & now his is acts of service. I'm going to mull over these great ideas you've outlined for men & think of ways to serve MY man! As he's in the kitchen making his own dinner. *cringe* Thanks Sarah!!

Oh & the line, "Fruit-flavored beeswax had transformed my husband into the greatest man in the world!" made me laugh! :)
Sarah Heath said…
I'm so glad I could make you laugh :) It really is the best medicine! Yeah, I also think love languages evolve. I used to be words of affirmation, and now I'm acts of service. I wonder if it depends on what is happening in our life at the moment? Hmmm...

Popular posts from this blog

Praying For My Other Half

Something happened in one of our friend's lives recently that made me stop and consider how quickly life can change forever. It also made me realize that sometimes all that stands between our loved ones and a tragedy is our prayers. 
So my heart has been turning over the subject of prayer since then and most specifically prayer for my husband. It seems that I pray for everyone who asks-- close friends, strangers, and missions groups in far away countries. But my husband, the one human whom I share a child, a bed, and a life with, hardly gets any prayer attention. When he does, it's because I'm upset and am asking the Lord to change him. 
I want to change that. I want to become a woman who prays for the most important and probably longest relationship of my life. 
So I went online and found some other women who were also doing the same thing and found some resources to help me stay in prayer for my husband. 
The Better Mom blog has printable cards for 31 days of prayer for my …

Free from Guilt

A couple of friends and I have had conversations this week about the thing that seems to plague all women most of the time...guilt.

I feel guilty about standing my ground when I know I'm right. What if I hurt the other person's feelings? 
I feel guilty about honestly saying no when I don't want to do something.  What if I'm just being selfish?
I feel guilty about not attending every birthday or wedding I'm invited to. Or accepting every friend request on social media. Or volunteering for every empty spot on the church help list. 
I feel guilty about buying myself a new shirt. Or a new book. Because maybe that money could be used for something more important. 
I feel guilty for just wanting to be alone--a lot--instead of out partying it up with people. 
I feel guilty for sitting my kid in front of the TV for a few minutes while I write this. 
I feel guilty for just wanting a foot rub at the end of the day, and not a steamy evening of romance.

I feel guilty that I haven'…

Unexpected Lessons

Since I'm taking a break from writing this week, I was looking back through my blog archive and found this one from 2012. 

When I was single, I had never had a budget. I had never saved away in an account. I never felt I needed to. I made sure all my bills were paid and appointments were made and that seemed to be enough. 

I never understood why a couple would want to get a divorce over something as intangible as money. It didn't seem like such a complicated thing. 

After all, now that I'm married, life should be better with two incomes, right? That means twice the money to spend as we please. Right?

Not exactly. 

There are two vehicles, two mouths, and two very different ways of looking at finances. Not to mention four hands pulling out of one bank account.  The car needs new tires, the furnace stopped working, and I need a wedding present for a friend this weekend. But the mortgage is due, the phone bill is due, and that parking ticket still needs to be paid.

We have felt the…